I don’t know how it happend. My boyfriend and I were laying together in my bed. Before you think of anything dirty, I will say that we were only sleeping together (You know: snore, dream sleep), our clothes still on and nothing perverse intended…or so I thought. I fell asleep for a few hours and I woke up to find him, with his pants off and me with my pants and underwear pulled down. He was inside of me. I guess I was sleeping rather hard, because I didn’t feel anything until he started to move inside of me. I remember crying afterwords. I was very exhausted and I feel I wasn’t able to fight back as much as I could have. I don’t know how to feel about it. I have been raped before, but this time it was with a boy I love…I don’t understand how I should feel. Help?
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Sex without your permission is rape. Surely even in Texas! I mean a woman in this country couldn't be raped by her husband, in the laws eyes, in this country until the 1980s or something stupid but now it is recognised that this is an assault and breach of trust. Talk to your b/f ask him what made him think he could do it, if he didn't care if you were awake or not he can't be a very nice man. Don't feel guilty about being tired and not fighting back, it would be difficult waking up into a situation like that and even more confusing when it is your boyfriend who is inside you. I don't think I could ever trust a man who did that again, you should seriously consider your future with him. Sorry to ask but you should consider, did he get you drunk or use a 'date rape drug' to do this?
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It's rape. I'd report him.
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agreed rape - report him! I cannot believe this happened its awful! a person that you love and he did this :S hugs from me
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Yeah, but I still like him alot. Even though most of my friends think i schould end it with him, I have come to a point in life that I don't think I could find a boy any better. Stuff like this has happened before and I don't think I can learn to trust anyone else. Plus I can't stand being single, because I don't like being alone.
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You don't think you can find someone better than a boy who would f*** you against your will, and without your knowledge, while you trusted him enough to sleep in the same bed? And the least logical statement of the post goes to...
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pathetic, I know....
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There are plenty of other guys out there who aren't going to rape you in your sleep. Besides, how could you ever trust him again after he did that? Report him, and let him deal with the consequences of his actions.
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still, after certain events I have come to the conclusion that any boy would do anything for sex. In fact my bf told me that the boy urge for sex is so hard to control that it is even difficult to avoid rape sometimes. He basically said that he just lost control and couldn't help it. I figure that all boys lack control over lust and if given the opportunity would surely turn to rape. Oy...does that make sense? kinda prejusdice huh, but I find my beliefs in experience.
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oh i don't know though. I'm probably wrong...
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still, after certain events I have come to the conclusion that any boy would do anything for sex. In fact my bf told me that the boy urge for sex is so hard to control that it is even difficult to avoid rape sometimes. He basically said that he just lost control and couldn't help it. I figure that all boys lack control over lust and if given the opportunity would surely turn to rape. Oy...does that make sense? kinda prejusdice huh, but I find my beliefs in experience. That's bullsh*t! Complete and utter BULLSH*T. If he really can't avoid rape, he needs to be locked up! How can you believe this crap?
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i'm stupid like that??
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Never said you were stupid. But you're getting close. Step back and look at this. Girl meets boy. Boy rapes girl. Boy explains to girl that he HAD to rape her, because he's too much of a neanderthal to control what he sticks his penis into. Girl believes him, and even defends him. HOW can you not see all of the things that are wrong with that!? I'm sorry, but you've been played by this guy. He's laughing his @ss off AT YOU because you swallowed his bullsh*t story, and now he knows you're not only not going to report him, but most likely STAY WITH HIM! What the hell is wrong with this picture? You were raped, end of story. Why are you defending your rapist?
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yeah, I see your point...the reason I think I'm staying with him is because I just doubt I could do better than that, and I hate being alone. He is the person i have always put my trust into and tell all my secrets and problems to. Yeah, he raped me, but I would have no one else to turn to if I leave him.
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In that case, you need a psycologist. I'm not saying this to be mean, I think you really have a dependency problem here. You CAN get someone else. Think about it, you believe that you're hot enough to drive him so insane with lust that he'd rape you, but you don't think you're hot enough to attract another guy? You have self-esteem issues, and possibly a psycological dependency on this guy. Like you 'need' him to live your day to day life. You're stronger than that. If you can't do what you need to do in this situation, you need to get some help.
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(not to be annoying or anything but) that's why i'm here. i think i may need help.
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No, I understand. What I mean is the kind of help from a professional. We're all volunteers here. We're not licenced psychologists or psychiatrists, and that may be who you need to talk to about this. I'm not saying you're crazy, not at all. Just that you may have developed a sort of dependency on this guy, and it's keeping you from doing the right thing.
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if he loved you, he wouldn't have done that. get as far away from him as possible, get help, report him, do what ever it takes to make you feel safe. get some counseling it really does help. talk to me any time, i'm here for you.
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Why do you think of yourself like that? Don`t you think your worth more than being treated like an animal! You have some self esteem issues that need to be fixed with some couseling. You need to learn to have self respect also. Kick him to the curb! Get some help PLEASE
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How about an update, Osaka? It's been nearly six months, what did you decide?