As an ex self mutilator, I know the relieve of that first cut when you’ve tried your hardest to apprehend.
I have felt those same urges and powerlessness with one other thing: - My first true love. A way to finally prove and test you are addicted to something / someone is to deprive yourself of it.
How do you react?
How do you feel?
How is your emotional state? Ok. You’ve gone cold turkey and you’ve gotten him/her out of your system. You don’t think about or crave him anymore. You’ve kicked the habit.
Then you smell someone sitting next to you in the bus with the exact same aftershave/perfume as your ex lover.
( See it like a wif of alcohol to an alcoholic. ) ( a syringe to an crystal meth addict. ) Could that smell be enough to trigger something? To push you over the edge again and back into the arms of your ‘addiction’ ? After breaking up with my boyfriend I found one of his shirts lying in the laundry hamper. I held it up to my nose and smelt his scent. It felt like such a relieve.
It was enough to push me over the edge and call him. I am and will always be addicted to him.
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with love you are just supposed to see where the road takes you...
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The road took me to a very very dark place. Getting out of it saved my life. But still my addiction was to strong..
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You know, I actually just spoke to a speaker today about love and relationships. It was pretty interesting, he told me that love is like duct tape stuck to your arm. When you rip it off, what happens? It hurts and it always has little things stuck to the sticky end of it. Meaning no matter what, and no matter all of that hurt, you will always carry him with you. He will always be stuck in your mind, especially since he was your first love. You experienced memories with him that you never had with anyone else. But time heals everything, and soon you will move on and you will forget about him and move onto a new love.
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Nicely put. :) Love might not leave you strange ticks or rots your brain. But it does leave scars underneath..
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Exactly, haha and thank you.
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Watch the movie "Dopamine." Or at least Google it.
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Consider that an addiction is a type of self fulfilling action. Love, ultimately, is not selfulfilling at times. As you probably have seen, love can cause a lot of personal pain sometimes. I think there is a lot more going on than the whole science aspect of chemical reactions in the brain. It might be an addiction in the first phases, but long term mature love, I feel, is much deeper than addiction. Simply put, after years of being together, there are going to be times (no matter how infatuated you were in the beginning) when you can not stand being in the same room together. Bye Bye chemical reactions in the brain... Love is hard, don't get me wrong. I know you are trying to figure it all out, we all are. I'd suggest not buying into the idea that we are programmed like a robot in regard to love. Just follow your heart and don't even bother with the science/spirit part.
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Of course it is. Love is just a series of chemical reactions that humans have developed as a result of evolution. "Love" as we know it simply promotes the survival of the species. If we were all polygomous and didn't really give rat's *** about one another the survival rate for humans would be radically lower. The endorphins that cause you to feel "love" are rewards for bonding with another person. To suddenly be deprived o such endorphins absolutely causes a brutal withdrawl.
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To be honest- I disagree and beleive that you will never forget. Move on- Deffinatly. Loose feelings for the former lover- Ofcourse. But you never forget the pain and passion you once had for a person.
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Btw, just so no one thinks I'm crazy - that was my friend commenting through my username ^