last time i tried to tell her she thought i didn’t want her in my life anymore and guilted me into staying with her, but i can’t do it anymore
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Why not just move out?
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how old are you? :)
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Just explain to her that you do want her in your life still, but you want to get your own place.
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tell her to get over it and leave
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by giving her hints like im not a kid any more or just by moving out
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Hey, we don't know if you have a job to earn money or if you are in college...if she is footing the school bill, try to deal with it and socialize more outside the home. If you need a job that will afford you to leave, interview with a nanny agency in your area for a live in position.
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Number#1 How old are you? Maybe she is scared or worried for you.
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Hi there Anony ... I'm a mom. My youngest son just moved out of the house. I am adjusting to the empty nest syndrome now. Moving out is not easy on you or your mom. It is a huge (major life) change for both of you and causes significant stress. Bottom line dear, if you are over 18 and you want to move out ... that is entirely up to you. If you can swing it financially then you need to do it, if you are ready. Reassure your Mother that you love her and that you will come by and actually look forward to visits with her. Then DO schedule to visit with her. Tell her you can plan movie and dinner dates with her. My boys always come home to do their laundry. It is much cheaper than going to the laundry mat. I don't mind, because I get to visit with them. Encourage your mother to find activities that she enjoys and use these activites to develop social networks. She can volunteer at the hospital, etc., etc., these activities will ease her loneliness. You are not responsible to make her be un-lonely. That is her job, it is a natural evolution of live ... it is now her developmental task. All of us parents who have done a good job ... will experience this challenging transition. That is another idea, let her know what a good job she has done raising you ... you are capable and willing to move on into the world. This is a good thing ... not a bad thing. So point out the positives, reassure her that you love her and that you will make certain that you visit (because you will miss her), give her ideas on what she can do to ease this transition for herself ... congratulate her on a job well done. Be kind. She is your mum ... she loves you and will miss you terribly, after all you have been with her for many, many years ... she has given much of herself to you. But, certainly, if you are ready ... then it is time and no it wont be easy. Good luck. BE NICE to your Mom ... and hug her!
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Also, I guarantee you will continue to NEED her ... for advice and support. So, as well, let her know you still need her and plan to stay in frequent contact. All of this will let her know you are thinking about her ... ie: you care about her. K ... Good luck.
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The family you leave behind now is the family you may need money from later.