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We have recently told the kids (7, 4, 2) that we have to watch our spending and that things are going to be different around here from now on.... the 7 year old understands this and has said to me: "Mommy, we are like the Weasley's in Harry Potter...." (((The Weasley's are a poor family in the HP series!!)) Well, I felt sad that in his eyes we are now "poor", but at least he will perhaps stop bugging for things like Peter Piper Pizza days (I used to take them EVERY Wednesday after school and spend over $20 bucks on tokens for them.... yikes, I know...) Anyway, they also miss out on a lot of other get-togethers with other families (dinner out after soccer practice etc...) so I feel kinda bad. On the other hand, perhaps this will be a good thing for him in terms of his understanding of money and it's value...
As for the 4 year old, he just knows we don't go to McDonald's or Peter Piper any more, and that I say "No" at any request for the slightest thing. Even a fruit roll-up at the store, which I would have normally allowed him to tear into the package and eat it as I shopped. But, it was 50 cents and I knew it was one of those impulse items that "add up" so I just had to say no.
As for my relationship with my husband, he is so relieved. He told me he feels that a huge weight has been lifted from his shoulders and he actuallly has some hope for the future instead of a pervasive DREAD. He is very happy with me and I feel his tension evaporating. He even tackled the yard work with a fervor I have never before seen! He is usually so annoyed with the yard.
Anyway, it's interesting to see a change in our family and I just wonder what effects money, saving money and money issues have on other families.
Kelly
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We went from 2 incomes to 1 in the middle of this year. Things have changed slowly. Our kids are 15, 13, 8 and 6. We have stopped our impulse shopping, stopped buying every movie that came out that we wanted, stopped extravagent weekend spending, and had to really concentrate on the important things. If a birthday's coming up, we save up for the present and whatever else we choose to do. We save up for doctor's appointments that aren't completely covered, or our contact lenses. Nothing can be an unplanned purchase. We signed up for Blockbuster online which gave the kids a sense that things are still normal, and saved money. We make trips to the library more often, we make special dinners so no one misses the chinese take-out or the Taco Bell. And we've been doing great.
Until -
My husband wanted to work for another company. He put his 2 weeks in, moved over to the other place and took a 25% pay cut in doing so, the first week. He was promised something and given something else. He immediately went back to his other job because the "problem" had left and his boss really wanted him back, was willing to negotiate. So in the time between that job and this one the pay went down 50%. It has been horrible, but oddly, not just financially. It has taken a toll on our moods and the stress level is higher with the uncertainty of paying bills. I've been a huge crab, the kids feed off my negativity and they're nasty to each other. The husband and I were barely speaking because the only thing to talk about was stressful crap. But this week's better.
So yeah, you've got to make some adjustments, really watch yourself. And the best part is you can be creative and not lose the quality of life your family needs. Your kids will learn that ripping into a Fruit Roll-up and trips to Peter Piper weren't what made them happy. Most likely it was spending time together and with you. So don't lose that. Halloween just passed, hopefully they got some treats. We're saving ours and allowing a treat here and there. It's nice. It makes you think creatively and "out there". We have pajama parties in our living room, we make forts in our living room, go to the beach at night, things we wouldn't do if we had the money to do something else.
I wanted to recommend signing up for the newsletters at . I don't always have the means to do the things they show for crafts and recipes, but it reminds me to stay on top of my creativity, to make a smiley face on the cheeseburger, to keep things along the way for crafts, to improvise, all that.
I was glad to read your experience. So thanks for sharing it!
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We are really changing the way we spend money. We recently moved from Pennsylvania to Indiana because of DH's job. His hours are extremely varied so I am not working and staying home with our 12, 6, and 1 yo. this is something I have always wanted to do, yet I constantly feel stressed about money because our income has dropped quite a bit from what it was because of me not working. I am trying to relearn how to spend money and only buy things we need, not want. It is so hard! Thanks for the post, it's nice to hear other ideas.
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For my family we are alsways stressed. The money problems are makeing us forget who we are. So my dh as decided to go back to school. Dont ask me how we are going to pay for that. And Im sure we will have even harder tiems to come.
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Thanks for sharing we are in a tough spot if we can only make it until febuary and use our tax money to pay off all the medicals bills they are mounting we are up over $3000.00. I was so sad because we desperately need a new sofa(stuffing coming out of ours) and i finally thought we were gonna get to get a new one well then the medical bills started pooring in so no sofa...Luckily my sister in mn her inlaws got new furniture and asked them if they new anyone that wanted there perfectly good furniture and they said yes me!!!so my dad brought back the 2 chairs and if i would come up there and get the sofa my sister said she would pay for my gas...so you see things do works out they may take awhile and you may have to take the hard road to get there but i believe eventually things work out...
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Wow what a story.
We have some money sitiations here as we live paycheck to paycheck with no savings or nothing to fall on in an emergency.
The kids are okay with me not spending constantly on them, but dh wants to always go out and spend money. Its so hard! But we are better. I've been working on a budget and saving all our receipts so we know how much we actually spend in a month. Dh and I do argue alot about money, mainly the fact that we never have any. It sucks, but we are working on it.