Ask:
My ds has almost always slept in our bed. He didn't use his bassinet, and rarely slept in his crib. My dh used to take him back to his bed everytime he crawled in bed with us but he would have to take him back three or four times a night. Sometimes now though on occasion he will sleep in his bed until four or five in the morning. They grow up so fast and turn into teenagers that don't want to be around you (I have a 14dd). He dh's cuddle bug because I can't sleep with someone with their leg or arm over me but dh don't mind. I like my space. Anyway is this something that needs to be stopped? I watch Nanny 911 and think, yep the Nanny would definitely have him in his own bed. I would forsee my dh and I not sleeping for a long time though trying to break him of this habit. I think he comes to our bed unconciously now. I was wondering if he will eventually think he is too big to sleep in our bed.
Answer:
I think Nanny 911 is entertaining, but I would never use it on my kids. I just think it's harsh.
We broke ds of sleeping in our bed when he was late 3, early 4. We got him a toy he really liked, that he wanted to sleep with, and told him that if he wanted to sleep w/toys, he needed to do it in his own bed.
Then, when we started getting the visits at night, we quietly ('cause he was still sleepy) got up and walked him back to his room. At times, we simply tucked him back in and kissed him goodnight, at other times, we cuddled him until he fell asleep (sometimes, we did, too). Yes, there is a period of waking 2-3 times or more, but they eventually stay where they are when they realize it's not worth the hassle of getting up. My son's 6 now and does sleep in his own bed. Especially w/school in the picture, they need their full sleep.
Now I have dd in our bed and am looking forward to trying the toddler bed.
Answer:
As a child I had terrible dreams and nightmares and was so scared at night- I just wanted to be close to someone and feel secure. Sleeping in the same bed with my mom helped me feel secure enough to sleep well. Even as a teenager I would have awful dreams and would lie awake in bed for hours, too scared to sleep. Just my opinion- I think kids who don't sleep well and constantly want to sleep with their parents really do need extra reassurance.
Answer:
I think eventually he will outgrow it. Before my boys had bunkbeds they did it more often but now they sleep together half the time. Before bunkbeds my oldest 5 would come in and my dh and I would take turns going to his bed, it made sleep easier. Super Nanny might not agree but it worked for us.
Answer:
My oldest has always been the one to sneak into our bed. But he is impossible to sleep with. He kicks, tosses and turnes...and I don't like to be touched when I'm sleeping, or kicked. I give him a kiss, push him out and tell him to go to bed. He goes.
Answer:
My kids will sleep in their beds but won't "go to sleep" in their beds. KWIM? They fall asleep with us or on the couch and then one of us has to move them. Even my "little" one is a 50 pounder so it's a workout every night. A lot of times they end up just sleeping with us.
I know it is probably bad parenting but seriously, they are very attached to us and really aren't away from us hardly ever. DS even sees me during school b/c I work there.
The time will come soon enough when they want nothing to do with us - so for now I will grin and bear it.
Answer:
I really think he will out grow this. I slept with my mom until around six, and one day she went and put this new big bunk bed on layaway for me and made a big deal how I would sleep in it and all. When it finally came that's what I did. My kids sleep in their own beds now. We did the big kid bed around 3 for them. Youngest dd is just now starting to move onto her own bed most nights. When my kids are sick they still want to sleep with me. So I just open the sofa couch and we sleep there, Not to comfortable and they make their way to their own beds after a while.
Answer:
Originally Posted by treehugger
My oldest has always been the one to sneak into our bed. But he is impossible to sleep with. He kicks, tosses and turnes...and I don't like to be touched when I'm sleeping, or kicked. I give him a kiss, push him out and tell him to go to bed. He goes.
That is exactly what he does he sneaks in, and crawls in between us without us knowing it. Then when I realize it I don't want to wake him to send him to bed and I sure can't carry him to his own bed anymore. Now when he would used to wake one of us by getting in bed beside us we would tell him to go back to his bed and he would go, but he would be back and the cycle would start over.
Answer:
Originally Posted by treehugger
My oldest has always been the one to sneak into our bed. But he is impossible to sleep with. He kicks, tosses and turnes...and I don't like to be touched when I'm sleeping, or kicked. I give him a kiss, push him out and tell him to go to bed. He goes.
That is exactly what he does he sneaks in, and crawls in between us without us knowing it. Then when I realize it I don't want to wake him to send him to bed and I sure can't carry him to his own bed anymore. Now when he would used to wake one of us by getting in bed beside us we would tell him to go back to his bed and he would go, but he would be back and the cycle would start over.
Answer:
Originally Posted by littlelizard
My kids will sleep in their beds but won't "go to sleep" in their beds. KWIM? They fall asleep with us or on the couch and then one of us has to move them. Even my "little" one is a 50 pounder so it's a workout every night. A lot of times they end up just sleeping with us.
I know it is probably bad parenting but seriously, they are very attached to us and really aren't away from us hardly ever. DS even sees me during school b/c I work there.
The time will come soon enough when they want nothing to do with us - so for now I will grin and bear it.
He does go to sleep in his own bed too. Thats what I wondered if I was being a bad parent for not working on keeping him in his own bed. I'm glad I am not the only one that does this. I really thought I might get lots of posts telling me I should work on keeping him out of our bed at his age.