Ask:
Good morning, first post in trying to conceive and pregnancy. Here's my story: We've been sticking to living within our means much better, we are selling home for a cheaper one and paying off bills with some of the proceeds. We should be in pretty decent financial shape. So... we have been considering adding a third. Dss is 15, comes every other weekend, dd is 6. Part of me hesitates to go back to the baby days, but my dd is pretty much an only child 80% of the time. I cannot imagine not having grown up with siblings all the time. I worry that now the age gap is getting bigger and dd would not benefit much with another sibling now. (Although she desperately talks about being a "big sister") I am only 30 and dh will be 36. Also, I am Rh sensitized. Don't know if anyone has heard of that. What it means is that my blood is Rh negative. Early on in pregnancy with dd, we exchanged blood. I was exposed to her Rh positive. I now have antibodies against my babies (who have Rh+ blood). Pregnancy for me would be rather risky. It will probably involve intrauterine blood transfusions during the pregnancy which usually can result in an 85% chance of having a healthy baby, since I am already aware of the condition and would be seen early on by a maternal-fetal specialist. There is also a possibility my baby would be Rh negative like me which would result in no problems. I am stressing over this because I feel that dd isn't getting younger and neither am I or dh . This time around I would have the gift of being a stay at home mother, something I desperatly wanted to do with dd and I still feel that she would benefit from me being at home. I have the "baby bug" but it does not come without fear due to the surrounding circumstances. I was wondering of any of you have had any experience with Rh sensitization or know someone who has. Any advice or things to consider is welcome from all!!! Thank you
Answer:
I know someone who has had two babies (I think) after being Rh sensitized (they were both Rh+ I believe). She was monitored much more closely and she did not deliver at full term (usually around 36 weeks, I think) so there were some concerns about prematurity (her last baby had a few breathing problems I think), but all of her children are basically healthy as far as I know.
Good luck whatever you decide.
Answer:
Hi there. I read your post and although I don't know anyone with your medical situation, I thought I could comment on the whole child benefiting from a sibling part of your post. My 2 boys are 5 years apart and I thought for a long time we would just have one. My dh really wanted one more so when ds turned 4 I decided to try for 3 months and if I got pg, great, if not, it wasn't meant to be. I wanted to deliver by the time I turned 35 if I was going to do it. Well, I got pg the first time we tried and now we have 2. My oldest has benefited so much from having his little brother. Sure, now that my little one is almost 2 he drives his big brother up the wall sometimes but the oldest absolutely adores the youngest and the youngest thinks the oldest hung the moon. Older ds really looks out for the baby and is so incredibly proud of each little accomplishment. He teaches him so much. Dh and I sometimes think the oldest was ripped off not having an older sibling because our oldest is so wonderful to the baby! (did that make sense?!) And the other benefits for the oldest, besides the companionship and the entertainment factor, are that he has learned so much about patience and sharing and waiting his turn and generally looking out for others and not putting himself first.
Good luck with whatever you decide!